Getting Your Difficult coParent to Use coParenter
You’ve downloaded coParenter. You’re excited to use it. Your coParent? Not so much. They have every excuse in the book for why they won’t sign up. We get it. Some people were just born to be difficult. It’s frustrating, but we got you. Here’s a list of common reasons why a resistant coParent may not want to participate – and some useful responses from parents and what you can say to inspire those people into action. Let’s get that coParent to download the app, sign up, and actually use it, shall we!?
coParenter’s Secure Messaging
coParenter’s secure messaging feature means communication can’t be edited or deleted, so you always have important conversations saved. For yourself. Or for the judge (if it comes to that).
Your coParent says: “So we need apps now to communicate? I’ve got text messages and email, thank you very much.”
You say: “coParenter has a secure messaging system. Neither one of us will be able to edit or delete these message threads so we’ll always have them for reference. If you – or a third party – ever need to reference your conversation history, it’s super easy to access and print out.”
coParenter’s Information Organization
Your coParent says: “I’ve got spreadsheets for keeping things organized. And this thing called my memory.”
You say: “With the coParenter app we will always have a safe place to store important information. We’ll both have access to their current health card, medical & school info so there’s never any confusion about important info about our kids.”
Live, Professional Help Designing a Parenting Plan
Your coParent says: “I don’t need an app to help me schedule my time to see my children. That’s what attorneys are for.”
Try this: “You wouldn’t seriously rather spend thousands of dollars and dozens of hours trying to design a Parenting Time Schedule with an attorney, would you? Me neither. This app can help us with our Parenting Plan to save money and time. We can try it- and if it doesn’t work we can always hire a lawyer. You can use the money you save to take the kids to Disneyland!”
Mediate Agreements On Demand
Your coParent says: “You’re impossible. I can’t allow you to have the kids on Easter Sunday. We need to let a professional figure out what’s fair!”
Try this: “Do you really want a stranger making decisions for our children? That’s what would happen if we take this to a judge. coParenter has a FREE feature where we can access a real-live Professional to help us solve our problems and mediate agreements. They’re trained, neutral professionals who can help us think of solutions. They’ll even document our agreements for us so there’s a record of what we commit to.”
Request, Respond, and Document Agreements
Your coParent says: “I’m not using an app to decide if I’m going to let you take the kids for an extra weekend next month. I’ll just email my attorney like a normal person and see what he says about giving you more time.”
You say: “By using coParenter we can eliminate the expensive middleman and make simple, documented requests. Planning vacations or travel, signing the kids up for activities or even sharing expenses… all of our agreements about our children are saved, and accessible to both of us in case we ever need them.”
On time Pick-ups and Drop-offs
Regarding coParenter’s Check-In Feature, your coParent says: “I’m not letting this app track my location. Are you crazy?”
Try saying this to your coParent: “Don’t worry, it’s not a GPS tracker. It only sends a notification when you’ve arrived to exchange the kids and you click the button. We’ve both been late in the past… and with this app, we can keep track of how well we’re meeting our pick up and drop off obligations.”
Great Articles & Education
Resistant coParent says: “I don’t need any help with my parenting, thank you very much. You’re the problem, anyway!”
Try this: “These guys send out great articles and stories every day about how we can really put our child’s needs first. There are so many people going through the same things as us– and it’s good to learn how other people manage. Plus, there’s always great advice, tips, and checklists that we can use. ”
For more coParenting blogs and tools to help you in your coParenting journey, CLICK HERE and download our FREE coParenting app.
About Stephanie Brooker
