Prior to pushing out my own bundle of joy, Mother’s Day was just another made up holiday to force me to spend $5.99 on a greeting card and pull my hair out stressing to find the perfect gift for mommy dearest. My brothers and I tried dinners and even small appliances, but we found that most times a large bouquet of flowers did the trick. My mom is great, one of the strongest women I know. She deserves the world but to our advantage, she’s pretty simple.
On the contrary, as much as I would like to believe that I am, I am not that simple when it comes to any holiday that pertains to me; birthday, Christmas, Valentine’s Day and yes, Mother’s Day. I mean, I don’t wear a cape, but I am definitely a superhero of sorts. Aren’t all moms?
I just saw this picture of what 10cm dilation looks like and I’m like, “WTF! Moms are incredible!”
Single and co-parenting moms get extra points. As a single mom with a nearly absent co-parent, Mother’s Day is one of those up in the air holidays.
The first Mother’s Day as a single mom, I didn’t know what to do, should my son be with his dad the entire day, giving me a well-needed interlude? Do I ask him, or should he offer? Will he help our son purchase a Mother’s Day gift for me? He should. There were so many questions and expectations, I became exhausted just thinking about it.
After that Mother’s Day with no mention of gratitude or even offering to give ya’ girl a break for a few hours to take a nap or get a long overdue mani/pedi, I threw my expectations out of the window and decided to approach Mother’s Day my way. We learn best by example and I figured the only way my son would learn the importance of Mother’s Day is by example, even if it was just another made up holiday.
I’m teaching him that expressing gratitude to those you love goes beyond the ‘special’ day our country sets aside to honor them. Give “flowers” daily. Showing appreciation frequently can last longer than any bouquet of flowers.
My son has the awesome opportunity to live with both his mother and grandmother. How awesome is that? We take advantage of the teachable moments each chance we get. When special days, like Mother’s Day approach, we make them a big deal. He signs grandma’s $5.99 card. He gets excited when I let him pick out the bouquet of flowers and balloons. I decided a few years ago to celebrate all of the mothers in my family by hosting a Mother’s Day brunch. We look forward to it each year and each year it gets better. Although it’s one of the highlights of our year, I am reminded every day of what each day should be about; Love, Gratitude, and Appreciation.
Every day is Mother’s Day, isn’t it?
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About Minah Banks
